These feelings and thoughts are symptoms of a treatable condition. With help, you will get better.
What I feel deeply compelled to share, and what has resonated most with you, you’ve told me, isn’t about that recovery journey in hindsight. It’s the normal life I lead now as a mother, who despite her own healing around eating and body image, still struggles in ways that you relate to. You are on this journey with me because it’s your journey too.
I’ve been meaning to write to you for a very long time. You’ve been busy, though. Growing. Bending. Creating life, and then pushing it out. And so quickly you turned around and did it all a second time. Despite my silence, I’ve been pulling for you, and please trust that you’ve been on my mind. I regard you with both deep adoration and perhaps only cautious acceptance. This is probably the root of my avoidance of late. I admire you and I fear you, because you have changed. You’ve accomplished crazy awesome feats and have evolved in ways that can be frightening and uncomfortable to me. Even now after so much time healing and nurturing a more positive image of […]
It’s taken a lifetime to come to grips with the secrets I’ve kept about my mistakes, struggles and poor decisions. Relax. These aren’t dirty secrets. These are the kind of secrets you’re only fooling yourself by keeping. Meanwhile, I’ve grown a career as a helping professional who believes in the power of storytelling, of authenticity, of connection. As a child, I created stories and dreamed of becoming an author. I studied journalism in college and wrote a column for the campus newspaper. But through the haze of coming of age as a mother, a wife, a professional, a human of the world, I stopped writing. Without that tool, I lost my voice in a way. And I forgot the power […]
LCSW | amateur mom | motherhood in recovery | blogger-to-be